Monday, August 6, 2012

Day 21: Weed and social circles

Smoking weed started out as a social activity way back in middle and high school. The first time I smoked weed was in the 7th grade.After I graduated high school I started buying my own bags. Then by my second semester at college I knew all of the people who were music majors and who smoked weed. After that I began to live the lifestyle of a "stoner" or "pothead" I would smoke weed multiple times a day. I would get high before my classes and especially before the music ensembles I played in. I started thinking that weed was good for me because it would allow me to forget about everything else and focus on a single thing. I thought it made me creative and able to freely express myself. After the next year I started to get anxious when I got high, depending on who I was around when I got high. I didn't want to hang out with these certain people but because they had weed I would hang out with them. It started to become a big problem. If I didn't have any money or my friends didn't have any then I would end up hanging out with those whom I didn't want to just because they had weed. 

So this has ended up in me hanging in social circles with those who smoke weed all the time - To this very day. Most of the people I hang out with smoke weed so I assume that I should just keep smoking weed because all of the people who I think are my friends smoke weed.

I will be back at school next week and I know the opportunity for getting high will come up. I know that people are going to be smoking around me. There is nothing wrong with smoking marijuana but there is something wrong with my relationship towards marijuana. This is why I have decided to stop smoking weed for 21 days.




I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place myself in situations that I don't feel comfortable in, in order to get weed or get high.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that my relationship towards weed is not what is best for all when I hang out with those whom I don't want to be around just because they have weed to sell or smoke not realizing that doing this is based on self-interest and my need to get a high. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place myself in situations where I wait around for hours and hours and put off my responsibilities in order to get a bag of weed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the social circles I hang out with influence me to smoke weed.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to direct myself when I am hanging out with those who smoke weed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear going back to school and hanging with the social circles I involve myself with because I have decided to stop smoking weed for 21 days.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe that I need weed in order to have fun with those who I socialize with at school.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being around those who I hang out with without smoking weed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use weed as a way to feel socially acceptable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that those who I hang around with will think I am weird if I don't smoke weed with them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let others who I socialize with, which is something outside of myself, to influence what I accept and allow myself to exist as instead of accepting and allowing myself to direct myself while around those who I socialize with.

I commit myself to stop myself when and as I have the opportunity to get high with those who I know I don't need to be around.

I commit myself to not accept or allow myself to place myself in situations where I wait for getting weed, accepting and allowing myself to let the opportunity to getting weed to influence me into not taking responsibility for myself and obligations.

I commit myself to take responsibility for myself instead of accepting and allowing the social circles I hang out with to influence me into making decisions.

I commit myself to not accept or allow those whom are in my social circle to influence me to smoke weed. Instead I direct myself and do not accept or allow anyone or anything outside of myself to influence me into smoking weed.

I commit myself to direct myself and take responsibility for myself whenever I am around those who smoke weed, not accepting or allowing anyone outside of me to influence me to make my decisions for me.








No comments:

Post a Comment