This is a continuation of Day 20: No Weed for 21 Days
Day 21: Weed and Social Circles
Day 22: Weed and Creativity
Last night I hung out with some people that I met at the beginning of the semester. One of the girls who came over asked if her friend could come over and she came over. This girl likes to smoke weed and I told her how I quit smoking weed. I showed her my bong and she bought it from me, lol. I let her smoke in front of us and the smell brought back some memories.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the smell of weed to trigger memories of driving from college back to my parents during fall, thanksgiving, x-mas, and spring break - smoking weed while driving, listening to Bob Marley and Sublime and having a feeling of happiness from listening to this music, thinking and believing that I understand and feel this music better while being high.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that while being high I let the feeling of being high influence what type of music I listened to and used it in order to get a feeling of happiness and a type of orgasmic feeling.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the high of smoking weed to influence what type of music I listen to.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I understand music better while being high, thinking that I can hear better while being high.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think and believe that being high helps me live in the moment and that this helps me hear music better than I could if I wasn't high.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that while being high, the buzz was in charge of me and my choices and not actually me myself and when I came down I would make different decisions compare to while being high.
I commit myself to investigate all the memories that have to do with me smoking weed and being high.
I commit myself to investigate and apply self-forgiveness accordingly when hearing a certain type of music reminds me of being high.