Sunday, January 13, 2013

Day 113: Procrastination and homework

Procrastination with my homework is something I have always done and I now realize why I have failed classes before. I have written about this before but never actually applied any self correction. I have always tended to cram before exams. I choose which classes I want to study for and the ones I don't want to study for. If I get a late start on studying for a certain class at the beginning of the semester I have thoughts like "It is too late to catch up". Then I believe that I can't catch up and put the class aside and pretty much ignore it. Sometimes I miss the first day of class and if I miss the first day of class I have the same thought "It is too late to catch up".

So this next semester starts in 2 days and I have always told myself that I will take self-responsibility for my studies at the beginning of the semester and never followed through. I get excited and believe that I am going to take self-responsibility where I am only imagining myself taking self-responsibility which is just a futuristic projection.


I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that I have failed classes in school because I didn't take responsibility for studying and keeping up on a daily basis.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cram before an exam not realizing that I didn't take self-responsibility for studying on a daily basis and only studied when I thought it was necessary.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to study more for certain classes than others because I like certain classes than other classes not realizing the accumulative effect of putting off studying for the classes that I don't like. .

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that when I get a late start on studying for a class during the beginning of the semester I tend to ignore doing the work for the class and put it off over and over again.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to say to myself "I will do it later" when and as thoughts of doing homework for a class comes up within me and when later comes I again say to myself "I will do it later" not realizing that saying to myself "I will do it later" over and over again is procrastination thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate with my homework.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tell myself that I will take responsibility for studying and making sure I am on top of things and not follow through.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the image of taking responsibility for studying in the future create excitement within me.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that being excited about taking responsibility for studying is only an image that I have created in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself taking responsibility for studying instead of doing it in the physical. I realize that when I imagine taking responsibility for something that I am not actually taking responsibility as taking responsibility can only be done in the physical.

I commit myself to study for all classes a little bit each day even if feelings of not wanting to study because I don't think it is necessary to study come up within me.

I commit myself to study for all classes on a daily basis so I do not have to cram for an exam and place myself in a stressful state of mind. 

I commit myself to review the material that has been shared with us so far on a daily basis so I don't have to place myself and my body in a stressful state when an exam is near. 

I commit myself to know what is expected of me and what I need to do to be successful in completing whatever class I am in and I commit myself to ask the teacher whatever it is that I don't understand about what we are expected to do even if I think it sounds stupid. 

I commit myself to when and as I tell myself that "I will do my homework later" to stop what I am doing if I am not in class or obligated to a music rehearsal to stop whatever it is that I am doing even if I am practicing my horn and to complete the studying that is necessary for that day. 


I commit myself to stop all the images of me taking responsibility in the future for studying and when and as these images in my mind come up I commit myself to stop the images in my mind by physically doing what it is that I am imagining myself doing.

I commit myself to when and as a feeling of excitement comes up about seeing my studying being completed to stop myself and breathe and then physically do the task that I am excited about.

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