Monday, March 25, 2013

Day 149: Drinking Buddy Part 2


This is continued from Day 148


I commit myself to notice when and as I am hanging around my friend and thoughts of wanting to get with her sexually come up within me.

I commit myself to realize when and as I am acting out this manipulative friend character that I put on while I am around this friend and I commit myself to once I notice that I am acting out this character to stop it immediately by expressing me as me and not as this manipulative friend character. 

I commit myself to when and as this friend and I are having a conversation about what is going on in our lives and an energetic feeling comes up within me to not accept and allow energetic feeling to continue into sexual thoughts and if these feelings do create sexual thoughts within me I commit myself to stop and breathe when and as this happens. 



I commit myself to not accept and allow this friend to flirt with me by sitting on my lap and I commit myself to not accept and allow myself to flirt with her and massage her back while she is sitting on my lap as I realize this leads to having sexual thoughts towards this friend.  

I commit myself to express me as me when and as I am around this friend and to not accept and allow the point that this friend is a female to influence me into acting differently and I commit myself to be me as me no matter who I am around as I realize that if I am myself and expressing me as me no characters will be acted out until I realize that I am acting out a certain character. 

I commit myself to when and as I am drinking with this friend to not accept and allow myself to drink to the point where this friend and I get into emotional/feeling type of conversations as I realize the whole conversation wouldn't have happened if the alcohol wasn't involved. 

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