Thursday, December 26, 2013

Day 223: the Secret Life of Walter Mitty Review

Yesterday I saw the movie "the Secret Life of Walter Mitty", and I wanna share my thoughts and how I can relate to Walter in the movie. This was based on a book put out a long time ago.

Walter does this thing where he "zones out" and goes into the mind while missing the reality he is physically in. So he quite often goes into the imaginary reality of his mind. Anyone can relate to this imaginary type of thing whether it be backchat or imagined futures or whatever.

Two examples here:

 Walter sees a girl who he has a crush on and when he sees her he sometimes "zones out (as they call it in the movie)". He goes into the mind and imagines diving into a building that is about to blow up and saving his crush's dog. He imagines things that will impress her and "zones out" during these times while in actual reality she is right in front of him.

Another example is that Walter has a boss he doesn't like. There was a scene where Walter's boss gets on an elevator with him and he imagines this crazy fight where they are kicking the shit out of each other. When he comes back to reality he has noticed his boss poking him on the forehead with his index finger. This is a great example of extreme backchat.

Anyway, I don't want to give the whole movie away. He ends up finding out that in order to stop "zoning out" he does physical things and the more he does things in this physical reality the less he "zones out" and this is actual living. He learns how to live in the physical so to say more than he ever has through the adventures he ends up going through.

Ben Stiller plays Walter Mitty in this picture. Every time he "zones out" I could relate. For example, sometimes I would be around certain teachers and think "fuck you you simple minded piece of shit" in my mind while smiling or while even the teacher is talking I wouldn't even hear what the teacher was saying because I was "zoned out" in my own imagination.

The title of the picture was called the SECRET life of walter mitty for a reason because it focuses on the secret backchat and imaginations we all go through. It was a cool film.

Monday, December 23, 2013

Day 222: My Prejudice against Teachers

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to complain about the educational system to the point where an emotion of anger comes up within me.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I by myself can't change the educational system and by complaining about it to myself and others does nothing but give me a headache and cause anger within me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take my anger out on the teachers I have had. Thinking that they should change the way they teach to suit my individual ideas/wants of how I think a classroom should be ran.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe a teacher should change their teaching style in order to benefit me not realizing that in believing this I am not taking others into consideration and only myself and not realizing that this is self interest.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to place myself in the shoes of the teachers I have had not realizing that this system is set up for the teachers to follow rules and not following the rules of what the people in the system expect can lead to firing or getting in trouble and not realizing that their income depends on following the rules.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in a form of prejudice where I automatically dislike any teacher when I realize they are a teacher and that they are some form of evil that is against me not realizing that I am separating myself from anyone who may be a teacher.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that my prejudice towards anyone who is part of the educational system as a teacher or administrator, etc.. is the same thing as being racist or sexist and that this form of prejudice is just as ignorant as being racist or sexist. 

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that whenever I place someone into a category them I am separating myself from them and participating in a form of prejudice.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and purposely make it known to certain teachers that I have had that I don't like them through body language and through giving them dirty looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that just because someone is a teacher that they are against me and out to get me not realizing that that this belief has to do with events that have happened in my past and not realizing that this belief is a confirmation that I am accepting and allowing my past to have an influence on me today. 

When and as I see myself complaining about the educational system like the teachers and others who work in it - I stop and I breathe. I realize the educational system is not as efficient as it could be and that complaining about it only creates anger within me that has an effect on me and those around me. I commit myself to stop the thoughts and emotions that come up within me when talking about education with others or reading something about education through noticing that the anger that comes up within me turns into verbal diarrhea combined with anger. 

When and as I see myself participating in a form of prejudice that I have towards teachers through thoughts and emotions - I stop and I breathe. I realize that just because someone is a teacher or works in the school system doesn't mean they are out to get me. I commit myself to stop the prejiduce I have towards teachers and those who work in the school system.

When and as I see myself thinking that assignments a teacher gives me and other students are stupid assignments and a waste of time - I stop and I breathe. I realize that I am in school to get a piece of paper that might help me with my employment opportunities in the future. I commit myself to do the assignments the teacher assigns and instead of complaining about it to sit down and do it as I realize this is the way for me to graduate.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Day 221: Indoctrination and being Pissed Off!

Continuing on with my last post and within this I am going to write out how I feel about education. In the last post I said something like I am not coming from an emotional/feeling point when I look at the education I have received but I obviously am, lol. When I look at the education I have gotten myself into I am dissappointed. I remember a quote by Twain or Einstein, can't remember which one but the quote was something like "Never let your education interefere with your learning". This is how I feel about college and every other type of institution that has to do with learning or education.

So I am obviously pissed at the educational system for a lot of reasons that I am aware of. I sit here now and ask myself "what good is it to be so pissed off at this educational system?" I have been pissed off ever since I was in grade school - at teachers and classes and how things are ran, the system in general... but what good does this do? I realize that instead of being pissed off at how the educational system is ran today and all the bullshit involved that it would better to learn how to work with it. I realize that being pissed off at how today's educational system is conducted doesn't do anything but irritate myself and everyone around me. I can't change the system just because I don't agree with it. I am fighting fire with fire so to say.

Friday, December 20, 2013

Day 220: Indoctrinated

I have almost completed my undergraduate degree. I have one more gen ed class in order to get the piece of paper that says I have been indoctrinated by the educational system. As long as I have been in college I can say that I have learned nothing at all. All of the classes are about memorization and regurgitation. In all the history courses I have taken it has been more about the dates and memorization of these dates than actually investigating why and how events happened. How fucked up this educational system is, and I am not necessarily coming from an emotional/feeling perspective here. Yes, I am pissed about this educational system and how students are taught but anyone with any common fucking sense should be able to SEE and UNDERSTAND that we aren't learning anything in the classroom. What we are learning is how to reguritate information and knowledge rather than understanding the bits and pieces of how things have come to be in this world.

Within this rant I realize I am angry at the system and that bitching about it isn't going to do anything for me but give me a fucking headache.  I will continue with this..