Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Day 227: College, Authority, Debt and being Pissed Off Part Two

Continued from Day 226: College, Authority, Debt and being Pissed Off


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that living with my parents is going to be an adjustment to my lifestyle during my time away from them and the lifestyle of partying and staying up all night.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in an emotion of regret when I think about my life as a college student and how I didn't do the homework and studying necessary to pass classes and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that not going to class and doing the homework for classes causes a result of wasted money not realizing that my emotions of hating the educational system got in my way and caused problems for me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to question the teachers I have had classes with not realizing that they got offended by this questioning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my emotions to be in control of me while questioning teachers while in school not realizing that while questioning these teachers I was in an energetic state of mind and wanted them to see things from my point of view instead of looking at their point of view as well.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in an emotion of anger when I think about my school debt not realizing that I am in debt and went through an institution and borrowed money. I realize the only thing I can do is deal with the debt situation I am in throughout time.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the interest on my student loans.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will be in debt my whole life. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think "this system is so fucked up so fuck it, fuck everything" not realizing that emotions of anger are connected to this thought and not realizing that staying pissed off does nothing for me or those around me.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that in order for the system to change I must become apart of it as I realize that rebelling and bitching about it does nothing but cause separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my anger to take me to the point of not writing, thinking their is no point to it instead of realizing that writing myself out helps sort my thoughts, emotions, feelings, and reactions out by dissecting the shit. 





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