Monday, June 23, 2014

Day 239: The Rollerskaters

Now that I live in an area where not many people play music the desire/want of playing music with other people comes up. A memory that I have a positive/feeling attachment to is when I played with some of my friends at the high schools "battle of the bands". All of us in marching and concert band who liked punk rock formed a band called "The Rollerskaters" LOL. During that semester we would rehearse a few times a week playing punk covers. During school while I wasn't paying attention in class I was looking forward to rehearsing after school. It was very fun. I remember someones mom gave him money to buy a bunch of blank white t shirts. We designed all kinds of t shirts that said "the Rollerskaters" with a black marker and gave them to all our friends.
We had an extra member of the band that we added to the band who just danced while we were playing who was a good friend of mine. It was a very fun time and I sometimes wish that I could go back to that time. I felt a sense of creativity and freedom during this time that I miss.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to the memory of rehearsing for the battle of the bands with my friends in high school band and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to charge these memories with a positive attachment.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to go back to the time where I was excited about rehearsing with my friends while in class in high school after school for the battle of the bands.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the energy/high I was pre-meditating while in high school where I was wanting school to be over and thinking about making music with my friends after school was over.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to remember the time when those of us in the band created t shirts that we gave out to our friends and to connect this memory to a fun and positive feeling.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to go back to the time where my friend was a member of our band who only danced while we were playing and I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that having my friend dancing in front of the band while we were playing was creative instead of seeing and realizing that I got this idea off of the band the Mighty Mighty Bosstones.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I have many instruments that I can experiment with like the guitar, the trumpet, and keyboard.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I can't be creative while playing an instrument while not playing with someone else.

When and as the memory of rehearsing for the battle of the bands with my band friends in my friend's garage after school comes up I stop and I breathe. I realize that this memory is just a memory and that I cannot go back to that time because I am here right now. I commit myself to be self aware of when and as the memory of rehearsing for the battle of the bands with my band friends in my friend's garage and to simply recognize it and let it go. I do not accept and allow this memory and the positive feelings it causes when I think of this time to continue playing in my mind.

Will continue with this as it has opened up many other points...

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